My college ministry pastor and I discussed the importance of 1 Peter 3 on Wednesday morning.
The chapter focuses on the role of spouses, but it also provides some important messages that are applicable to young Christian men regardless of their relationship status.
A few verses in particular focus on the necessity for Christians to have courage, which feels like a dying trait in the age of cancel culture.
“Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. ‘Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened,’” 1 Peter 3:13-14 states.
“But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. For it is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil,” the passage continues.
Christian men, let’s face it: We’ve gone soft.
Every day more believers fall into the “Christian nice guy” trope, which is spiritually weak-kneed and inauthentic. We would like to pretend that our lives are perfect, and we find ourselves constantly replying back with a robotic “good” each time a friend or acquaintance asks us how we’re doing.
The unspoken part about this trope is that we feel that God (and the world) owe us something for checking all the right cultural boxes, even though most of us will never admit it. It’s a hard-to-swallow pill for many Christian men that God does not promise us a flawless personal life, a perfect career, or anything else except for His love. Beneath the fragile exterior is insecurity, resentment, and self-righteousness.
So what happens when we’re chasing social acceptance instead of Him? We become cowardly doormats.
If someone is too concerned with everybody liking them, he is afraid to be honest with others. A successful Christian community can only be achieved when the interactions are active and genuine.
While we are obviously called to love one another, the Bible also makes it clear that tough love and boundaries are necessary. On that same note, truly respecting someone includes telling them what they do not want to hear once in a while if it’s intended to be helpful.
For the parents who are reading this, it’s important to make sure that your son understands the value of living his faith inwardly and outwardly, especially when he is a teenager and young adult. It’s no secret that we all struggle, but pretending those battles do not exist is dangerous in itself. As the older generation, parents and mentors have a responsibility to encourage younger believers to be vulnerable yet strong.
Sometimes we need to be reminded that church is a hospital and not a place to “be seen” and that salvation comes from Christ, not our friends.
If the men have no spine, the church won’t either. Christian men, let’s get off autopilot and start being present for God and the communities we serve.