In Defense of the Green Monster

Political News

Fans reach out to touch the “Green Monster” scoreboard during an open house at Fenway Park in Boston, Mass., in 2012. (Brian Snyder/Reuters)

In response to Re: A Conservative Move to Improve Baseball

I awaken from my longtime slumber on the Corner to address one of the more pressing issues of the day. Alexandra, speaking as a Yankees fan, laments that the Green Monster in my beloved Fenway Park — which John Updike famously called the “lyric little bandbox of a ballpark” — turns home run “smashes” into “measly doubles.” And this assertion is undoubtedly true, as Giancarlo Stanton and John Sterling would surely attest.

But as a Yankees fan, surely she knows that one of the most famous Yankee home runs of all time was a meager little fly ball hit by Bucky (expletive deleted) Dent — a non-“smash” that would have been a routine fly out in every other park in baseball, and perhaps a few little-league parks.

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The Green Monster taketh. The Green Monster giveth away. And therein lies its mystery and majesty.

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